As I reflect, each year or "season" in life is tough. Different from others. This one was tough as we had a mobile 1 year old, not yet able to verbalize his desires, not yet able to truly PLAY with siblings, but 100% dependent on us. We had an eight year old and six year old, both incredibly brilliant girls, but clearly each needed space--from each other. They had their moments of love, but each trying desperately to figure out how they fit into our family life, trying to figure out their own likes/dislikes, etc. As if we weren't crazy enough, we welcomed a puppy into our madness. This cranked up the level insanity a million, but she too, is figuring us out. In the midst of it all, Chris and I were trying to engineer our lives and orchestrate the greatest composition ever.
It was tough. We've gone back and forth more times than ever before, weighing weighty decisions, choices and options. Trying to figure out "his" plan before a plan was even necessary.
It is with this that I've told Chris we need to sit back and stop. Stop planning. Stop putting option 2, 3, 400, 49084, in place. Stop. Enjoy. Live in the now. Enjoy our life. Enjoy our amazing little beings. They are amazing. We have the best. I am convinced. Each incredible. Each brilliant. Each teaching us. We have a good life, heck, a great life. We need to ENJOY. One day we will look back and miss it all. We will desperately wish, pray and give anything to go back to our crazy, busy, adventurous life with our amazing little family. These glimpses of happiness, joy, and LOVE are what keep me sane. I just wish they were views vs. glimpses. I could use constant reminders of the amazingness that exists everywhere I look. God is good.
This is my work in progress.