parenthood

Since our lives have calmed down a bit, I have been finding myself sitting, staring, and feeling completely overcome with emotion as I watch our children. I marvel at how blessed we are to have two amazing girls. Truly amazing. They are so similiar, yet unique. Claire has become a young lady of sorts, interested in babies, doing things herself and yet, doing things just like us. She is in love with Mya. She dotes on her like no other and when Mya expresses any sign of unhappiness, Claire changes her voice into a sweet, melodic tone and rushes to her side. Claire still loves to be held, snuggled and smothered with love. She cries when one of us leave to run errands, but is completely thrilled with her time at Miss Maureen's house. Claire loves to talk on the phone and is already such a tech-savy little princess. She'll definitely surpass our knowledge soon. She talks like a little grown-up so much of the time that we need to remind ourselves that she is only two. It is sometimes challenging to keep our expectations in check with her age. Being her parents has its share of challenges. She is hard headed, stubborn in fact. She wants to do EVERYTHING her way and for herself--take her clothes off, put them on, buckle herself into her carseat, open her snacks, climb up into the chair. We typically don't mind, but having patience can be difficult when we are running late or trying to do a million things at once. Claire has begun to test the waters in regards to rebelling. When we ask/tell her to do something, she'll do the opposite, but look at us to see our reaction and often laugh as she runs away. Frustrating yes, but that smile can turn the darkest of skies, bright, bright, bright. As for Miss Mya, well, she has only been in our lives for four short months, but this kiddo has us wrapped around her fingers. She is such a honey. I feel so much love for her that simply looking at her can instantly bring tears to my eyes. Her smile is so big and her eyes simply glow. She is incredible. I love holding her in my arms, snuggling her and being mezmorized by her. She has such a calmness about her, watching and taking in all that the world has to offer. Mya has had an eventful four months of life and yet, she takes it all in stride, definitely a lesson that I could learn. As I was making an appointment with the pediatric determatologist today, I couldn't help but find myself tearing at the thought of all not being well with our little bubby girl. I feel I am pretty laid back, but a worrier just the same--an odd and almost impossible combination I suppose. Anyway, I have realized through parenting that your heart is constantly on your sleeve. I am okay with any illness or issue that may come my way, but not my babies. Although I firmly believe God has a plan for each of us, seeing that plan unfold is somewhat scary. It must be the control freak in me. Mya is fine, don't get me wrong. She is healthy and happy. We are just getting some baseline information collected with the hope that we will never need it. I write this post simply to journal my love for my girls. They truly are my life. My Mom has told me several times recently how kids truly are the greatest things in life. She's right. I would do anything for mine. Anything. I am sure any parent would do the same. Chris and I often talk about how quickly time has flown since we became parents. It seems our kiddos change constantly and although we try to live in the moment and savor every smile, every "I love you," or every snuggle, it is such a challenge not to feel at least one ounce of guilt or worry for what we should have done or what will be. I suppose that is what it means to truly be a parent.